Monday, September 14, 2020

Pen Pals

I have always tended to like writing emails. But finding people to correspond with is sometimes difficult. My guess is that less than 25% of the people I've ever considered friends actually like writing emails.

However, there are websites to connect people who like to correspond by email or postal mail. I tried one called PenPal World, first in 2018 for a while, then again from the end of 2019 until maybe a month ago. I find myself going through phases with scenes. I have to get away from the scene for a while. So I'm taking a break from seeking out new pen pals. (And maybe not coincidentally, I feel less of an appetite to write emails.)

I have three pen pals from that. I had a number of not-so-bad penpalships that didn't last, and only one that was a little bad. I don't know how online dating compares, but it might be in the same ballpark in terms of the ratio of negative to positive to "fizzle" experiences.

You can find strange, often political or intellectual people on Twitter, and a similar bias toward the public and the performative in other social media sites. But PenPal World, and penpalling (I would guess), seems to attract quieter people.

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Update: 23 August 2023

Since writing the above, in 2021 and 2022, I used PenPal World. I feel like I should point out that pen pal sites often have bad reputations. People say "scammers and perverts" use them. (I had correspondence with someone who was probably a scammer, and someone who was probably a "pervert". Nothing really bad happened to me because of those people, but the risk is there). I think my experience overall was more positive than negative, but there is some risk. PenPal World may not be the best penpal site.

I used PenPal World somewhat seasonally (starting in winter and spring and taking a break in fall). I guess it's been about a year since I last used it and I think I still have one or two pen pals that I am not in touch with much but whom I could email. Sometimes after a seasonal activity, I come back, but other times I feel like I have moved on from that time in my life, and that is how I feel about pen pal sites now.

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